Philosophy || A conversation on love

This is a conversation between two friends. Let A be the girl and B be the guy. (I'm sorry, being a mathematician, this style of writing is now embedded in my head)

PS - I always wondered how can anyone get more wisdom by just talking to someone. I always thought that wisdom comes with age or by listening to learned people. But I was pleasantly surprised to see the give & take of wisdom during a simple conversation between two friends.

A: Ek baat bata (Tell me something) ... Do you know the difference between loving someone and being in love?

B: Well .. If in both cases 'love' means love for your romantic waala (ignore the word) partner .. Then for me, there is no difference.

So basically, if I love someone, then I am in love. Same thing for me.

A: Hahaha

No being in love is like sacrifice wala love (Being in love is like you are willing to sacrifice in that love).

Loving someone is like when you care for that person of course. But no magic, no sacrifice. And if there is sacrifice, it is because of responsibility or because the relationship demands it.

When you love, you're upset that the person is hurt.

When you're in love, tumhe dard hota hai jab use chot lage (You feel the pain when he/she is hurt).

Magic, of course, can vary ... Of being in love or of being in a relationship.

Are you getting what I'm trying to say? I mean, the kind of distinction I have in my mind?

I'm not asking you to agree with me. But can you, for some time, believe what I'm saying and try to understand it?

Being in love is ... Ishq wala love! :P ('Ishq' means love but there is a stupid Bollywood song called Ishq wala love, and the same has been used here)

B: Haha

Yes, I know what you are hinting at

A: I wanted to ask you something different from what you're thinking I'm thinking :P

If you're marrying someone you're not in love with, but you love her .. Is that wrong?

B: Basicallly ... Love is love ... For someone love means sacrificing everything for the happiness of other.

A: See, in an arranged marriage, you can't fall in love in a day. And I'm ruling out love at first sight fundas. So all that can happen in an arranged marriage is that you start liking the person, which, by the way, is infatuation. It is a situation when you get sort of attracted to that person, physically or mentally. And by the time you get married, you start caring for each other. So basically, in most of the cases of arranged marriage, couples start loving each other much before they fall in love, if they ever fall in love.

B: You complete first

A: I know I'm being technical here .. But I'm trying to analyze something. And that is that you are probably right ... Dating is when you get to know the person coz if you have to marry someone for whom you have a liking, then no harm in marrying someone whom you are dating.

B: Done?

A: Haha yes.

B: Talking about love, it's like dark, darker, darkest.

Basically, if the color is black then I might say it's dark or very dark, etc. It's how I feel about love that describes it for me.

I am someone who believes that if by letting go of my lover is the best thing for her, then I will do that even though I know I will cry my whole life after taking that decision.

May be someone else in love won't let go because 'he is in love' and can't live without her.

There is no right or wrong in this. It is how you feel about the extent and dynamics of attachment with someone will define 'love' for you.

A: I agree. But, everyone's dynamics are not under our control.

B: Love is so personal.

No one else should ever disclose their dynamics.

So did you find any solution of your question?

A: No

It is just that you can't impose yourself on someone ... So unless both are ok, any relationship would lead to unhappiness.

B: Yawn! Let's continue this some other time.